After a dementia diagnosis, or when you suspect one
What to do first in Washington, whether you have a diagnosis in hand or just a worry and no workup yet. The legal and driving steps that get harder to do every month you wait.
9 minute read. Última revisión 2026-06-30.
A dementia diagnosis, or the fear of one, lands as a wall of unknowns. You do not have to sort it all out this week. Washington has a free guide built for exactly this moment, the Dementia Road Map from the state's Aging and Long-Term Support Administration and the Dementia Action Collaborative. It walks through the stages, from Wondering and Worried through the later stages, and it has a section for care partners. You can read it online or order a printed copy in English, Spanish, or Russian. This guide is the shorter version of what to do in the first weeks, with the Washington phone numbers and the two or three things that quietly get harder to do the longer you wait.
Ideas equivocadas comunes
The three that cost families the most, over and over.
Idea equivocadaNothing can be done about dementia, so there is no point getting a real diagnosis.
La realidadA real workup matters even when there is no cure. Some causes of memory loss are treatable or reversible, like thyroid problems, vitamin deficiency, medication side effects, or depression. A clear diagnosis also opens the legal window, the right medications, clinical trials, and every program that asks for it. Guessing at home closes doors that a clinic visit keeps open.
Idea equivocadaWe can sort out power of attorney and the money side later, once things settle down.
La realidadSigning a power of attorney and a health care directive requires legal capacity, and dementia takes that away over time, sometimes faster than families expect. The window to do this the easy way is now, while your person can still understand and sign. Miss it and the family is looking at guardianship, which is slow, expensive, and involves a court. Washington has a free program that helps you do the documents while there is still time.
Idea equivocadaIf I report Dad's unsafe driving to the state, it stays anonymous.
La realidadIn Washington it does not. A family member can ask the Department of Licensing to evaluate an unsafe driver, but the report is not confidential. The driver or their attorney can request a copy and see who filed it. That is worth knowing before you file, not after. The Department also rejects anonymous and secondhand reports, so the person who has actually seen the driving has to be the one to file.
Qué hacer
Roughly in order. The first two get you a diagnosis and a support line. The middle one is the time-sensitive one.
- Paso 1Get a real workup, at a memory clinic if you can
Start with the primary care doctor, who can run first-line tests and rule out the treatable causes. If the picture is unclear or the family wants a specialist, ask for a referral to a memory clinic. In Washington, the UW Medicine Memory and Brain Wellness Center at Harborview is one path. It takes Washington Apple Health (Medicaid) and Medicare and prefers a referral from primary care. A specialist workup gives you a clearer diagnosis, a treatment plan, and access to research studies if you want them.
Qué decir
“I am worried about memory changes in my parent and I want a full workup, including the treatable causes like thyroid, vitamins, and medications. Can you evaluate that here, or refer us to a memory clinic?”
Qué esperar
Blood work and a cognitive screen from primary care, and a referral to a memory clinic if things are unclear. A specialty clinic can take a few weeks to get into, so ask to be put on the list early.
- Paso 2Call the two anchors
Two phone numbers carry most of the early weight. The Alzheimer's Association Helpline is staffed 24 hours a day, every day, in about 200 languages, and it is free. You can talk through a new diagnosis, ask what a symptom means, or get a care consultation with someone who does this all day. The other anchor is Community Living Connections, the front door to your local Area Agency on Aging and the state's caregiver support programs, including respite and counseling. Put both numbers in your phone now, before you are in a crisis at 2 a.m.
Qué decir
“My parent was just diagnosed with dementia and I do not know where to start. Can you help me understand what is ahead and what support is out there?”
Qué esperar
A real person, no script, who will talk as long as you need and point you to local help. The Helpline can also set up a longer care consultation by phone.
- Paso 3Do the legal and money paperwork now, while there is capacity
This is the step families skip and later regret. While your person can still understand and sign, get the durable power of attorney for finances and for health care done, plus a health care directive. Washington has a free program for exactly this. The Dementia Legal Planning Program, run through the Washington Pro Bono Council, matches you with a volunteer attorney to complete these documents, including dementia directives. It is open to anyone age 55 or older, anyone living with dementia at any age, and anyone with a family history of dementia. Call the intake line to start.
Qué decir
“I am calling about the Dementia Legal Planning Program. My family member has memory problems and we need to get power of attorney and a health care directive done while they can still sign.”
Qué esperar
An intake conversation to check eligibility, then a match with a volunteer attorney. Because capacity can change, do not sit on this.
- Paso 4Have the driving conversation, and know the Washington process
Driving is often the hardest conversation. Start with the doctor, who can order a driving evaluation and, in many families, be the one to say it should stop. If driving continues and it is genuinely unsafe, a family member can file a Driver Evaluation Request with the Washington Department of Licensing based on what they have personally seen. Two things to know first. The report is not confidential, so the driver can find out you filed it. And the Department will not act on an anonymous or secondhand report. After a report, the Department may require a medical or vision certificate, a re-examination, adaptive equipment, or it may cancel the license.
- Paso 5Plan for behavior changes, wandering, and home safety
As dementia progresses, wandering and getting lost become real risks, and they can happen before you expect them. One low-cost step is to enroll in MedicAlert Safe and Found, the wandering-support service run by the MedicAlert Foundation with the Alzheimer's Association. It gives your person a medical ID and a 24-hour line that first responders and families can use if they go missing. Enroll at 800-432-5378 with code ALZ. For the day-to-day behavior changes, the Dementia Road Map and the Alzheimer's Helpline both walk through what to expect at each stage and what actually helps.
Lo que han aprendido otros cuidadores
Patterns caregivers describe again and again, put into our voice. Each one comes up independently, often with the same regret attached.
- The families who did the legal paperwork early almost never mention it again. The ones who waited talk about guardianship, lawyers, and a court date they never wanted.
- A lot of caregivers say the diagnosis itself was a relief, because it finally named the thing and gave them something to act on instead of a vague fear.
- The driving conversation goes better when the doctor delivers the verdict. When it becomes son versus father, it damages the relationship and the person often keeps driving anyway.
- More than one caregiver has said they wish they had called the Alzheimer's Helpline in the first week instead of the tenth month. It is free and it is staffed at 2 a.m., which is exactly when you need it.
- People underestimate wandering until it happens once. The ones who set up an ID and a plan beforehand describe the first incident as scary but survivable, not a catastrophe.
- Getting a workup that ruled out a thyroid problem or a medication reaction is a story caregivers tell with real relief. Not every memory change is dementia, and the only way to know is to check.
Reunido de comunidades públicas de cuidadores. Es un resumen, no una cita textual.
Recursos locales para esto
The local resource that matters most right now, pulled for your county.
- Your Area Agency on Aging
Your county's front door to caregiver support. Through Community Living Connections you reach the local Area Agency on Aging and the Family Caregiver Support Program, which funds respite, counseling, training, and equipment. They can send someone to assess the situation and connect you to home care and adult day services. The statewide number is 1-855-567-0252.
Cuándo buscar a un profesional
The Washington-specific help worth calling directly.
Three lines carry most of what a family needs after a dementia diagnosis. The Alzheimer's Association Helpline for anything about the disease itself, day or night. The Dementia Legal Planning Program for the documents that get harder to sign every month. And a memory clinic for a real diagnosis and treatment plan. The Washington Department of Licensing page below explains the unsafe-driver process, including the part where the report is not confidential.
- Alzheimer's Association 24/7 Helpline
Free, staffed around the clock in about 200 languages. New diagnosis questions, symptom questions, and care consultations. Washington chapter is alzwa.org, with local offices in Seattle, Spokane, and the Tri-Cities.
- Washington Dementia Legal Planning Program
Free volunteer-attorney help to complete a durable power of attorney for finances and health care, a health care directive, and dementia directives. Open to anyone 55 or older, anyone living with dementia at any age, or anyone with a family history of dementia.
- UW Medicine Memory and Brain Wellness Center at Harborview
A memory clinic workup path in Washington. Takes Apple Health (Medicaid) and Medicare and prefers a referral from primary care.
- WA Department of Licensing, report an unsafe driver
How to file a Driver Evaluation Request based on what you have personally seen. Note that the report is not confidential and the Department will not act on anonymous or secondhand reports. Underlying law is RCW 46.20.041.